At the Amboseli lodge, you go through the gate and past the electric fence and pull into a gravel parking lot surrounded by palm trees. The staff immediately greets you in fluent English. However, if you get too distracted, a monkey WILL jump into your slightly open backpack in search for food. My response was to yank it away from him and he quickly dashed off empty-handed.
You are filtered in through a creative, touristy pathway covered in imprints of animal footprints and surrounded by fancy garden statues. The gift shop is calling your name. You enter and it is one of the best you have seen yet, but you can’t buy anything more otherwise your suitcase will explode. You pass on the souvenirs, but it’s okay because the lunch buffet just opened.
The smell of real food is wafting down the hallway and as you proceed you encounter a few Maasai men dressed in traditional clothing. There is a sign at the lodge entrance STRICTLY forbidding photographing the Maasai, but you manage to get a picture with one of them later on anyway.
The buffet is the best food you have eaten in four months. Every bite is like a little slice of Heaven. You can barely contain yourself. The group almost gets kicked out because we are acting so inappropriately excited in the middle of this fancy lodge buffet. They have everything from brie to chocolate mousse. Finally something else besides lentils and ugali. You start to feel less malnourished again but so full you almost make yourself sick.
The next logical step is heading down to the pool. You change in a bathroom with flush toilets, noteable enough to be mentioned as it is unusual and special when you encounter a toilet that flushes instead of a creepy hole in the ground. The bathroom actually smells clean. Someone also mentions this. They even have soap at the sinks and a full-length mirror. It feels like America.
The pool is not green, unlike other lodges, and does not have any amphibians in it. Surrounding it are comfortable lounge chairs, waiters to bring you drinks and more Maasai warriors on monkey patrol. Mel and I are approached by one who talks to us for the next five hours. At one point he asks to trade for our iPods. He also tells me that if he cut off my blonde hair and brought it back to his village that people would believe it is a lion's mane. He’s a senior warrior, is saving up money to go to college and has killed a lion. We get a picture with him before we leave and exchange emails.
It’s time to leave since our curfew is 6 pm. We’re feeling pretty good and relaxed and spend the rest of the late afternoon game driving to the exit of Amboseli. The sun starts to set as you fly down the dirt road standing in the open roof of the Land Cruiser and drive by a hyena and several dozen elephants. It’s sad to get back to camp.
The next day you have a goat roast with your directed research group and local guides in the middle of nowhere in Kenya. There are no houses or infrastructures in sight, only thorn bushes. You hear in the distance the faint, familiar sound of cowbells, a sure sign that Maasai pastoralists are near. For the entire morning you cooked for the African-style barbecue, making egg salad, chapatti and guacamole and chocolate-frosted brownies from scratch. Upon arrival you see large pieces of goat meat roasting over a dying fire. The skin is still hanging out nearby, covered in flies. The Maasai man that cooked it, a friend of one of the guides, greets you in Maa tribal language.
When it’s time to eat the goat the group is divided up into three. Someone whips out a huge knife and we literally squat in a circle. The Maasai start cutting it up and handing out pieces, systematically going around the circle. Before you are even done with your first piece they are already forcefeeding you a second and a third and a fourth. You eat with your hands. Most of it is really tough and impossible to chew so you sneak it to the rabid-looking dog hanging out nearby whenever no one is looking.
Finally it’s time for the goat skull soup. You’ve been eyeing it since you arrived. There is literally the skull of a goat floating in some greenish looking liquid. Fat globules and a little bit of brain float on top. The Maasai have a contest as to who can mash up the solids the best with a little wooden tool. They fill up a mug and we share it among a few of us. I take a sip to say that I tried it but inevitably feel sick later on.
Dessert is the brownies, which everyone takes. The Maasai are funny: they inspect the brownie, even sniff it, before the try a tiny bite. Most of them have never eaten a brownie before. The traditional Maasai man who doesn’t speak English and has never even heard of a brownie holds it in his hand for a while before he gets up enough courage. At the end of the goat roast, he comes over and asks for another brownie, having licked off only the frosting.
Back to camp, and time to write your 50 page research paper!
Staphie, that sure sounds appetizing. Be sure to get all the recepies ! Love,
ReplyDeleteGrampie.